Wait For It… a blog by Andy Ross

To-Do List

My to-do list for today:

- Wake up. Rub eyes for three minutes.

- Sing first two lines of a song on repeat in the shower.

- Conditioner beard.

- Eat toast while staring at nothing in particular.

- Watch weather report. Zone out. Rewind DVR and re-watch weather report.

- Be mad at a yuppie woman on the train for no reason.

- Greet receptionist with a resigned sigh. Hear her sigh as I walk away.

- Eat grapes. Think about the children's science show from my youth, during which Slim Goodbody said the bronchioli in our lungs looked like tiny bunches of grapes.

- Begin blog post about grapes. Delete it.

- Ice tea break.

- Stare out window. See cute dog.

- Try to remember LinkedIn password. Fail. Make note to apologize to friend for taking so long accepting her LinkedIn request.

- Probably work a little.

- Receive huffy email about something stupid.

- Ice tea break.

- Read celebrity gossip about an actor I didn't realize was a Republican. Be weirded out.

- Worry in general about skin cancer.

- Tweet something semi-clever.

- Check to see if it’s been retweeted.

- Check to see if it’s been retweeted.

- Throw away grape stem.

- Check to see if it’s been retweeted.

- Remember my LinkedIn password but then realize I tried that one already.

- Oh yeah, work a little more.

- Get back on train.

- Make eye contact with woman who glares at me, assuming I was looking at her cleavage, even though I stopped looking at her cleavage like three minutes ago.

- Make dinner.

- Look at nothing particular on the Internet for four hours.

- Go to sleep.