Fall Limericks
I've written some more limericks for yourselves in honor of autumn. Good lord, I'm good at this. Is there a career path for the naturally gifted, yet somewhat lazy limerick writer?
Young loves on a trip almost done
Tried a corn maze off Route Fifty-One.
When they reached a dead end,
She proceeded to bend
And they found it a-maize-ingly fun.
A squirrel getting ready for winter
Was hoarding three months' worth of dinner.
When a pretty squirreless
Talked of coming distress,
He agreed that he'd store his nuts in her.
There once was a hipster named Randy
Whose long scarf seemed pretty darn dandy.
But sooner than later
On the wrong escalator
The emergency button proved handy.
When Ted saw a fresh-raked leaf pile,
He decided to jump in with style.
A half gainer he dived,
And his spine broke in five
As he missed the leaf pile by a mile.
A stunning cheerleader named Claire
Had oddly bright red-fuschia hair.
We thought it was dyed,
But we couldn't decide
'Cause high kicks proved down there was Naired bare.
When Carl called work sick with the flu,
His boss thought him speaking untrue.
So he snuck to Carl's house,
Where he spied his own spouse
Get a “flu shot” from ol’ you-know-who.
