Wait For It… a blog by Andy Ross

A Bad Peach

Posted on March 6, 2010

I ate a peach yesterday that I think might have gone bad. How can you tell when a peach has gone bad? Can I just describe to you what happened?

Okay, first off, the peach looked fine. It was about shoulder height and white, with brown spots. It had a nice, fine layer of peach fuzz. Except near the back, where it had a long tail. And, I guess it had some extra hair running down the crest of its neck as well. But, everywhere else—the haunches, the muzzle—had standard-looking peach fuzz. And, it wasn’t bruised, beyond one spot behind the ribs.

The problem started when I took my first bite. Don’t get me wrong, it was juicy and delicious. But, as soon as I bit into it, it reared up on its hind legs and tried to run away. I had to grab the peach by its peach reins and hold on for dear life. The damn thing tried to kick me, if you can imagine. A peach trying to bite and kick someone?

I finally got a hold of it, and I ate the whole thing. All the way down to the pit/saddle. I mean whatever it takes to get your five daily servings, right? But, my stomach is super upset today. I feel terrible.

I was wondering, do you guys think I could be allergic to peaches? God, I hope not.

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