Wait For It… a blog by Andy Ross

My Vices

Posted on January 18, 2011

So, I recently joined a cult. (They don't like it when I call it a "cult." but I figure life's too short to nitpick, y'know?) And, part of my indoctrination is that I'm supposed to list off all my vices in order to overcome them.

I don't know, it seems kinda silly. Or, worse, they could be fishing for blackmail material. But, the robes are so comfy, and I have my eye on a few cute cult ladies for the group marriage. One of them is named Blueberry Rainbow, and she said overcoming your vices is sexy. Then, she touched my upper arm. So, here we go; these are my vices:

1) I care too much.

2) I might be a little addicted to my Google Reader. Maybe.

3) Occasionally, I drink to just past moderation.

4) I'll eat red meat if no chicken or fish is available.

5) I talk about people behind their backs. All positive compliments, but that's still ethically shaky.

6) Once, I downloaded an album illegally to see if I liked it before I bought it.

7) I don't always shower before noon on weekends.

8) I shit in library books and then return them.

9) I chew sugary gum.

10) I've told my wife I enjoyed her tomato bisque even though I didn't quite care for it.

11) My eye sometimes lingers on Victoria's Secret commercials.

12) I regularly kill and hide the bodies of hitchhikers.

13) I'm somewhat superstitious when it comes to athletic matches.

14) It took me two days to redeliver my neighbor's cable bill when it was accidentally placed in my mailbox.

That's it. Those are my vices. I'm a little embarrassed to put the sugary gum thing out there, since it's a big taboo. But, if there's one thing I tell the hitchhikers I torture and eat, it's that honesty is a virtue.

Share

Flocked

Posted on September 30, 2010

When we were all still in Chicago, Steve Delahoyde, Mark Geary, Kumail Nanjiani, Jared Logan, and I made a sitcom pilot. I wrote it with Kumail and Jared. Mark produced. And, Steve directed.

The plot involves a con artist, played by the amazing Peter Grosz, taking over a cult full of misfits.

We filmed it in minus 10 degree weather in an old church. The pipes froze, and the propane heaters we brought in burned our lungs. We got no sleep. It was fun. I'm really happy with how it turned out.

That's why I'm sharing it with you below. I hope you enjoy it. And, thank you to Steve for putting it online.

Part One:

Part Two:

Part Three:

Share