The Greatest Slow Jam
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[Text of the above video, which was animated using the website xtranormal.]
After years of research, our scientists have developed the greatest slow jam of all time. This slow jam is the slow jam to beat all slow jams. It has more oh babies, gettings close, and feeling its than any that has come before.
However, we cannot release this slow jam. Testing suggested that this slow jam may be too powerful, too slowly jammed. Early listeners in the lab immediately began making love to each other’s faces. One participant, upon hearing the jam, ground her hips straight through her dancing partner.
Fearing this slow jam may be too dangerous, we will be removing two suggestive verses discussing how it has been “so hard” for “so long” without you. We believe this should solve the reflexive humping problems.
At least, we hope it will.
