Wait For It… a blog by Andy Ross

My Worst Day

Posted on November 3, 2010

I’ll never forget my worst day.

I was walking down a gravel road. Just taking a stroll and enjoying the pleasant summer weather. The sky was clear, and there were birds singing.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, I stepped down onto a pile of melted gummy bears. Right there in the middle of the gravel road. How did gummy bears get there? Did somebody drop them? Kids playing a prank? I had no idea. All I knew was that my sneakers were suddenly gunked up with sticky, gooey candy.

Can you imagine it? Picture it. Colorful, melted gummy bears sticking in between the tracks of my sneakers. Are you picturing it? Awful, right?

And, very quickly that candy was mixing with bits of gravel and sand. I tried to scrape it off on the grass, but then clumps of grass and dirt got all mixed in. I tried pushing it off with the end of a stick, but the stick kept breaking. It was horrible. The frustration of it all kept building and building.

Suddenly, I was getting hot, and I was sweating. I went to take off my shoes, but I realized I couldn't walk barefoot on gravel all the way back to the cabin. I remember thinking, I can’t imagine how this day can get any worse.

Just as I thought that, an adult male moose came out of the woods and kicked me directly in the testicles.

It was my worst day ever.