Wait For It… a blog by Andy Ross

Yoga Pants

Posted on December 30, 2010

Yoga Pants

Hi, welcome to Lydia’s Yoga Shop. We sell activewear for the active woman. Come on in, and I’ll give you the tour.  As you can see, we sell a wide range of yoga pants here at Lydia’s Yoga.

First up is our Kriya style of yoga pant. These are cut low at the waist and are terrific for everyday wear--running errands, catching a matinee. These start at around $78.

Next, we have our Prana yoga pants. These pants are cut higher in the waist with comfortable flat-locked seams. This style is terrific for swinging by a boutique or Trader Joes. These start at around $95 and come in charcoal or midnight black.

I should mention that none of our yoga pants are meant specifically for yoga. In fact, we actively discourage doing actual yoga in these yoga pants. It’s far too sweaty.

These are our Turiya yoga pants. These are designed to be worn during pedicures. Note the  four-way stretch in the seat and the slight flair along the leg opening. These start at around $112 and come in a massage oil-resistant fabric.

Our Abhaya yoga pants are great for picking up little Dashiell or Dakota from Montessori. They have a pleasant lift and separation in the seat. These are $140, but it’s worth the price when you see the jealous looks on the “working” mothers’ faces.

Again, we ask that you not do any yoga or yoga-related activities in these pants. No pilates, please.

Our Swami yoga pants are designed for watching Julia Roberts movies. They feature hip pockets and anti-chafing Juliamax™ technology. These are on sale today for $98.

Ah, I see you’ve noticed the Maitri yoga pants. These are perfect for a visit to the spa or a weekend away to Napa with your girlfriends. They’re also great for quick trips to Starbucks or the mall. You can have an affair with your personal trainer in these, or you could read the Betsey Johnson interview in Vanity Fair. Really, these are great for reading any magazines—O Magazine, Glamour Magazine, Elle, Real Simple, Vogue, Cosmo, US Weekly … God, do you remember Domino Magazine? I miss Domino.

You could sign up for an awareness walk in our Maitri yoga pants. You can shop for gluten or soy-free groceries in these. They’re good for attending museum events or gallery openings or divorce hearings. These yoga pants are great to wear while recycling huge numbers of plastic water bottles. You can dabble in starting a wallpaper design business in these. You can carry your tiny dog around the dog park in these. You can shop for bridesmaid dresses in these.

Really they’re good for anything except yoga. They cost around $125, and the matte finish is a nice contrast to any over-sized diamonds you might be wearing.

Can I interest you in any of our cashmere tanks or camis?

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