Wait For It… a blog by Andy Ross

My First Time Sexting

- Ready?

- I guess. For what?

- This is my first time sexting. I’m a little nervous.

_ Don’t be. You’ll be great, Sexy.

- So um what are you wearing?

_ A black sweeter and a par of red undies.

- What’s a sweeter? It sounds sexy.

_ Sweater. lol

- Oh right. LOL.

_ What r u wearing?

- A business suit, except no pants or underwear. Black socks.

_  Um…

- I mean, manly jeans and an old cotton t-shirt.

_ Ooh, that sound sexy.

- You mean “sounds” sexy.

_ right whatever

- And earlier, you probably meant a “pair” of red undies.

_ sure yup

- Which is sexy.

_ ooh yeah. real sexy

- Are we not capitalizing? Is that a thing?

_ Fine. Where are you? R u touching yourself?

- Did I make you mad? Sorry. Again, 1st time sexting.

_ Its fine. R u touching yurself??

- A little, but I got distracted by punctuation and grammar.

- Can we keep on top of that? Sorry. It’s just that I used to be a copy editor at the college newspaper.

- Also “it’s.”

_ Yes. I will try. Now, please, are you touching yourself sexually?

- Yeah. And it feles so good, baby.

_ WTF? R U kidding me? Feles? After yur grammar diatribe?

- That was just a typo. Sorry.

- Hello? Still there?

- Mad?

- Hello?

_ not mad. Just stepped away for a smoke.

- OK. Good.

_ wanna start back upp from where we left off?

- Oh, that’s OK. I finished up while you were gone.

_ really???

- I have a thing for distant, withholding women.

_ women? Whadya mean women?

- Wait. Who is this? Pamela?

_ Pamela who? This is Patrick.. From raquetball.

- Oh, hey Patrick. This has been you the whole time?

_ yup. who’s pamela?

- Nevermind. Getting used to new phone.

- Still on for Saturday at 4pm?

_ yeah. reserved the court. who’s pamela???

- I gotta go. See you Saturday.

_ okay. talk Saturday, sexy.